how to get a job

I recently saw a report on the news about the top three words to avoid using in a CV. They are ‘hate’, ‘awful’, and ‘mistake’. So then I felt obliged to get out my CV and delete those phrases which - according to these so-called 'experts' - are liable to put potential employers off. Phrases like ‘I hate work’, ‘work is awful’, and ‘hiring me would be a big mistake’. Who’d have thought it, eh? I would have expected them to be more concerned about terms like ‘surly’, ‘incompetent’, and ‘Tourette’s syndrome’, but seems it’s OK to leave those in.