horses etc.
In conversation over Sunday lunch the other week I carelessly used the phrase ‘Horses are sexy’. It was instantly taken the wrong way. I meant comparatively sexy; I meant that they have an association with sex. Instead it is now assumed that I spend my days off wandering the countryside, picking up horses and taking them back to my place for a good seeing to. Catherine the Great had much the same problem. If anyone knows anything about Catherine the Great it’s that she fucked horses. Well she didn’t; it was a myth. Similiarly, when I was out on Wednesday, I wasn’t slinking through fields, proffering sugar lumps to interested fillies. I was in London, watching a movie called Lemming. A French movie in which a couple find a lemming trapped in their plumbing, shortly before Charlotte Rampling shoots herself in their spare bedroom. Is that clear?
Even more normally, I saw Mission Impossible 3. They should have called the second one Being Tom Cruise so many of the cast got to wear his face. He’s a bit less smug in this one, which is grittily realistic in comparison but still fairly ridiculous. We sat quite close to the front. I had to fight off the dizzying sensation of being about to fall through the gap between Laurence Fishburne’s front teeth.
For the first time in ages I didn’t vote and look what happens. The BNP come into power. Well, in Barking. Parts of Barking. You can see why: New Labour has systematically stripped all the meaning out of politics. It’s all just language now: hype, spin. The BNP, on the other hand, have a really obvious meaning, which can be grasped by even the smallest child. You don’t even need to read their manifesto (a couple of pages of crayoned doodles). They may not last long, since their preferred method of conducting council meetings involves bottling anyone who disagrees with them (‘How dare you call me a thug!’), but for now, the people of Barking and Dagenham are happy, as the soundbites from the streets attest ('About time! No, I'm not racist. A bit thick, mind...')
Even more normally, I saw Mission Impossible 3. They should have called the second one Being Tom Cruise so many of the cast got to wear his face. He’s a bit less smug in this one, which is grittily realistic in comparison but still fairly ridiculous. We sat quite close to the front. I had to fight off the dizzying sensation of being about to fall through the gap between Laurence Fishburne’s front teeth.
For the first time in ages I didn’t vote and look what happens. The BNP come into power. Well, in Barking. Parts of Barking. You can see why: New Labour has systematically stripped all the meaning out of politics. It’s all just language now: hype, spin. The BNP, on the other hand, have a really obvious meaning, which can be grasped by even the smallest child. You don’t even need to read their manifesto (a couple of pages of crayoned doodles). They may not last long, since their preferred method of conducting council meetings involves bottling anyone who disagrees with them (‘How dare you call me a thug!’), but for now, the people of Barking and Dagenham are happy, as the soundbites from the streets attest ('About time! No, I'm not racist. A bit thick, mind...')
posted by martin at 9:32 AM
1 Comments:
On GMTV this morning they were talking about Madonna new tour and said the she made horses look sexy!!! See Mart you're not alone, u freak ;-)
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