the lost theme park
The other day while walking to work I saw an old man inching towards me along the pavement, aided by sticks. As I drew close to him he suddenly started talking at me: ‘Alright I’m alright are you alright?’ I smiled politely. He just went on in this vein: it was as though he was an exhibit in a high-tech museum and, in straying too close, I’d activated him. If I didn’t move away quickly, he’d keep on going until his voice got all slow and blurred and he shuddered to a halt. So I moved away quickly, wondering if I was living in some kind of theme park and if so, what is the theme?
At work I have been searching for books to return in the cavernous returns room upstairs. Occasionally the most hard-to-find books have ironically aposite titles, as though the Phoenix system is playing a joke. The other day, for example, I found myself hunting fruitlessly for The Lost Gospels. Meanwhile, Paula was rearranging the room according to the subjects each member of staff looks after. ‘Does Paul do “Pets”?’, she asked at one point. ‘Well’, I said. ‘I’ve heard rumours…’
Mat has gone to Canada, and yet his voice can still be heard in our kitchen, due to some sort of technology. Or perhaps he hasn’t gone to Canada at all; perhaps he has been eaten by the dishwasher. Wherever he is, he is working, and burbling away to himself as he does. Just what we need - ambient Mat. Although there is at least now the possibility of turning him off.
At work I have been searching for books to return in the cavernous returns room upstairs. Occasionally the most hard-to-find books have ironically aposite titles, as though the Phoenix system is playing a joke. The other day, for example, I found myself hunting fruitlessly for The Lost Gospels. Meanwhile, Paula was rearranging the room according to the subjects each member of staff looks after. ‘Does Paul do “Pets”?’, she asked at one point. ‘Well’, I said. ‘I’ve heard rumours…’
Mat has gone to Canada, and yet his voice can still be heard in our kitchen, due to some sort of technology. Or perhaps he hasn’t gone to Canada at all; perhaps he has been eaten by the dishwasher. Wherever he is, he is working, and burbling away to himself as he does. Just what we need - ambient Mat. Although there is at least now the possibility of turning him off.
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